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Monthly Archives: January 2015

Are you one of those people that arranges an appointment with a cleaning service, only to clean your place prior to them showing up? Do you brush your teeth prior to a dental visit? I never understood this concept or why people feel the need to do this. You already given the cleaning person permission to come over and clean your place. Maybe you called them because you were lazy, tired, overworked or just hoping it was a hot maid for a hookup. ūüėõ Okay well regardless of the reasons why you called them over, the point is why not let them do their full job? If ¬†you are paying them by the hour then it makes sense to spruce up the place a little bit so you can save some money.

However, if you are paying them one full solid price then why not let them do their job? I highly doubt they are going to come over and say, “Wow this place is a huge shit show!” No the likely hood is they have seen many dirty places prior to yours. You are basically calling and arranging someone to come and clean your place, then doing the job for them. Think about your job, does your boss ever call someone else prior to you showing up to work so your job is a little easier? The likely hood of this response will be no. So why would you do that for someone who you are paying to clean your place? Let them come over and clean. It’ll be worth it and who knows you will save yourself the energy and time too. I mean if you are going to clean your place prior to them showing up, then why call them at all? Why not just finish what you started?

The same goes for dental visits. I mean if you are going to get your mouth cleaned why would you brush and floss prior? You are paying them to clean your teeth so why not get your monies worth? ^__^

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So I decided recently to downgrade or upgrade to a older used vehicle. Working with dealerships or “stealerships” as I call them can be pretty nerve racking for some people, I think it’s super fun. People tend to get intimidated from the used car sales peeps. The pressure, the aggressiveness and the haggling, I find it all fun. Maybe it’s the sick, twisted and demented mind I carry, but car buying should be fun right? Why not make it¬†fun!

I am familiar with all of the tactics since I’ve worked at quite a few stealerships. My favorite is the “buddy” system. When the sales rep pretends to be your friend. They will tell you their entire life story as if it’s important and critical to the situation. Couple that with the “car is still here but people are looking at it” tactic and you have a recipe for some grave mistakes¬†from the buyer. I do not fall for any of these tactics and I don’t want you to either. Here’s some several great examples I received from several Sales reps via email.

Email from sales rep:

“This is my second year in the automobile business. I recently made a career change coming from the customer service industry. I became interested in (Dealership)¬†based on their proven history of satisfying their customer’s need while exceeding their expectations in a comfortable supportive environment.

When not working I enjoy spending time with my wife and 3 children. We enjoy family time especially in the outdoors. I am an avid sports enthusiast and enjoy running, playing basketball, football, soccer, and baseball. I was a former personal trainer and also enjoy spending time helping others reach their fitness goals in the gym. As a family we are weekly church attendees and find this to be spiritually rewarding.

I thought it would be a good idea to let you know a little about me as you contemplate from whom you will be obtaining your next vehicle from.”

One more thing about the “buddy” system. I had a female sales rep get so desperate with attempting to sell me a vehicle she asked me out on a date and promised a “good time” afterwards. It was pretty hilarious and crazy! I also like it when the sales person will tell you the Manager is the “enemy” and they are on your side. LOL Since when did this become a game of Parcheesi?

Here’s an email focused solely on rushing the customer in: “We have several people interested in the (Car)¬†right now; therefore¬†I cannot guarantee how much¬†longer it will remain on our lot.”

Finally, be weary of any Google Wallet scammers. I found a cool car online and the person sent¬†me this email: “As I told you in my first email, I recently got divorced. I got a new job and moved to Canada for a new start. The vehicle is ready to be delivered to its future new owner. The deal is handled by Google Wallet so I don’t have much to do about it. With Google Wallet you get free delivery, at your place in 4 to 5 days. In addition, you get 5 days to try it out before buying it, and if you don’t like it, you can send it back at my expense. I want to make it very clear, that Google will hold your money, and I won’t be receiving a single dollar unless you call and tell them to release the money to me. For more info on how it works, I can ask Google Wallet to send you an email with more details on how to buy it. They will contact you shortly, as soon as have your personal details. This way you also get proof that I am covered by them and I’m a legitimate seller. If you would like to receive the email from Google with all the transaction information, please reply with your full name, address and phone # and they will contact you right away.”

We all know no one is looking at these cars, they are just trying to get you in for that test drive because once you sit down in that driver’s chair, they will feel like a spider catching a fly in a web. They’ll tease you by saying things like their spouse has the same car and it’s super reliable. They will distract you from listening to the engine by playing the radio or making small talk. When you look at a car that you want to buy, make sure you look into the engine bay carefully. Look between the front bumper and the actual engine and radiator. Do you see anything amiss? Do you see weird paint spots? Stare at the color and body of the vehicle, do you see a fade in the paint or does it look a tad different in color? It could have been in an accident. Carfax won’t always tell you this either unless it was reported to the insurance or a police report was written. Look under the vehicle too, do you see anything hanging such as wires or the splash guard protector? Do you see rust anywhere? Be sure to warm the vehicle up too, once the engine is hot different things can be heard. Don’t be afraid to drive fast either, make sure the car has plenty of pickup and no engine lights come on.

It’s simple things yes, but these things can easily be forgotten once you step in and are greeted by that warm friendly smile. You’re just another number to them, keep that in mind too. Also it doesn’t hurt to look at the vehicle in both the daylight and at night, that way you can see if all the lights work.

Think of car buying like going on a date. Do you put out on the first date? It’s always good to hold out onto the second date to consider getting serious. Don’t be afraid to walk away, plus doing this can always result in the sales rep calling you to negotiate a better price. Never mention the trade in either until you are actually set on the vehicle. When you are looking at the paper work and it has the financing numbers on there, that’s the best time to mention the trade in. Then when they give you the new paperwork, compare both. If they give you a price after the initial visit, be sure to bring that with so you can show them the original quote. If¬†they say your credit is bad, try to arrive with your own credit report.

One time a VW dealership tried to do this to me just to get me to sign a longer finance term. In the end they are sneaky bastards and the best thing to remember is, are you in good hands? The only way to be in good hands is to be smart and savvy prior to even stepping into the stealership.

It reminds me of this bit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NeL46wpMLvc

Think of something that you really really really love. Whether it’s a hobby or a food. Take that concept, grasp it and think of doing it with someone who is really close to you. Say it’s a girlfriend or boyfriend, parent, brother, cousin, best friend, friend, husband or a wife. Say you two, whoever that may be, really love doing this hobby or eating this food together. Now imagine if people would stare at you and give you dirty looks while you eat or did this hobby with that other person. People even said you were going to hell for doing/eating it.

How would that make you feel? Would you feel regret? Maybe embarrassed? Or would you not care? Regardless it would be a pretty messed up situation right? Now stay with me on this imagination trip and pretend that you and a group of people who also love to eat/do this thing, whatever it may be, rallied together to show people, mainly the ones against it, that it really isn’t that bad! A huge debacle followed. The media fed off of this like a bunch of vampires and exploited it for the world to see.

Almost done here, but let’s take this a step further and imagine a court called the Supreme Court. The court of all courts. The decider, judge and possibly executioner. Imagine whatever you imagined that you love to do/eat and now imagine if the Supreme Court banned it forever. How would you feel not to be able to do whatever it was that you imagined? Would you be sad? Mad? Imagine having a group of people who you don’t even know dictate and decide things for you, especially something you love to do/eat. Who are they to tell you what to do?

This is basically what’s happening right now in the USA with gay marriage. Me? I really don’t care one way or the other what people do with each other, as long as they treat each other with kindness, respect and honesty (that’s how I treat people including you). I think it’s messed up to have a group of people out there deciding who and what people should do when it draws so much attention and debate. People should be able to be free to do whatever they love to do. Whether it’s marrying people of the same sex or eating a supreme pizza. Regardless, no one can ever control what people do, they shouldn’t be allowed to. Are humans that childish to bicker and fight that we need a deciding group of people to tell us what to do and believe in as if they are our parents? That’s pretty sad fellow humans!

Why? You may ask…the reason is simple really, we’re all no better than each other. I am not better than you and you are no better than me, we’re in no position to judge each other. We’re all human inside, your blood is the same colour as mine. Your bones are also the same colour as mine. The main point of this post is to remind you that you are in control of your own life and destiny. Do what you love to do and don’t regret it, you only have one life to live, make the most of it.

I watched the Matrix just now at 2am (I am a lot like Neo since I am at my computer at odd hours of the night) and realized something. What if we were living in the Matrix right now. What if you received that same opportunity? Would you trade in your normal routine of a life for a life aboard a metal cold ship and bowl of runny egg tasting slop? it raises a lot of questions like can you at least add salt? Did they not have condiments in the Matrix life? Without condiments how could they be happy with their food? Maybe that’s why they were singing and dancing in the sequel because they needed a distraction from the fact that they had no condiments. One cool thing about living in the Matrix world is the fact that you could learn Kung Fu in a matter of seconds rather than years. Of course you could learn a lot of things.

What are five things you would want to learn while aboard the ship? I would learn these following five things.

1. Kung Fu

2. What are the three sea shells and how the hell do you use them?

3. Who killed JFK

4. Who is your daddy and what does he do?

5. More Kung Fu

I know one of these you would definitely want to learn. Don’t lie to yourself! I mean who doesn’t want to learn Kung Fu? You could kick Lo Pan’s tall, green eyed obsessive ass in a matter of seconds! (I mixed in three movies in this blog, a new record)

Let’s get serious for a moment. If you were faced with the opportunity to become the One or even to just escape this place. Would you do it? You have no idea what awaits you on the other side. Getting out of the Matrix is a lot like dying, you suddenly find yourself in another place and you can do almost anything.

A tidbit, in the beginning of the first Matrix film, did you notice when Neo was in the Interrogation room he was being watched by the Architect. Mind blown? If you don’t believe me just watch it :p

The Matrix is one of my favorite movies because it makes you think about your own life and question reality. Plus it makes you think about the routine in your life. In many ways we’re programmed to accept our lives for what they currently are. That our lives¬†are not easy to change and we are in our own Matrix. In reality, you do have a choice, whether it’s something minute as in what’s for lunch to finding a new career path. Whatever you do in life, remember do what you think will make you truly happy. That’s my Matrix, being truly happy.

I talked about riding on an airplane before and how there are all those warnings about not smoking on the plane yet there is an ashtray in the toilet. (That’s such a tease) This time I am going to touch upon the subject of seat belts.

First and foremost more people are inclined to fasten their seat belts when riding on a plane. Though the chances of turbulence are more frequent¬†than riding in a automobile, people should do it in both situations. At least in the air the chances of another plane hitting yours due to a drunk pilot is slim to none. You never hear about that do you? ūüėõ

The second part of this that I find interesting is the fact that when you get on the plane and sit down, the fasten seat belt jingle comes on with the lighted sign. The flight attendants also wander the aisles to help and remind customers to fasten their seat belt. The best part of it all, once the plane is set to take off, they show you how to do it. So this is where I find a hole in the system. If everyone already has their seat belt on since a check was made prior to the flight taking off then why do flight attendants show everyone how to fasten their seat belts?

I suppose many of you will say it’s for safety concerns and what nots, but they did their check and even the little lighted signs show you how it’s inserted.

One thing that should be given on planes are jet packs or parachutes. It would be awesome if the seat cushion served as a parachute too in the case that zombies took over the plane and a need for escape was imminent. It would be helpful if jet packs were distributed too in the case of a total OMB the plane is going down moment. Though at that point I highly doubt people will remember how to operate such a device since they require assistance with seat belts, after all, there would probably be one with the jet pack.

Sorry it’s been about three years, I’ve been busy doing some more Q’ing and A’ing on this giant beautiful world we live in . One thing I learned is humans really love their weather. So many websites and news programs are focused on this very important topic. I know it can be very important to know when a serious storm is coming or a tornado, but do we really need to have so many names for these storms? I mean do we really want to make someone named Carl feel bad that a hurricane came in and left a city under a cesspool of trash? Does anyone think about Carl? They could really be affected by this! I know I was when hurricane Andrew came in and nevermind..just know this folks, we could use much cooler and effective names.

How about naming a storm Galactus? We all know how much of a jerk he can be, (for my non-geek/nerdy friends, that’s a super villain) so why not name a storm after him? Plus it sounds a lot more cooler to say. “Carl, did you hear about Hurricane Galactus?” or “Hurricane Galactus came in today and left a pile of rubble in every direction.” Plus people will remember it longer than a storm named after someone like Carl or Bob. Winter storm Iceman is going to freeze everything. That sounds extremely cool (bad pun?) and scary at the same time rather than, winter storm Norman.

Plus we could go a little further and change El Nino and Nina to something a tad less foreign. I mean El Nino, what the hell did a child do to you to cause it to be named after a weather anomaly? How about calling it weather¬†anomaly, “It’s going to get funky” is set to take hold of our climate for the next 20 years. People will remember that and it’ll also make it fun to say!